A farewell word

We cull the following gem from the fount of light and anti-Socialist sagacity, the Daily Express (April 28th) :

“ANTI-SOCIALIST CAMPAIGN.

“The Anti-Socialist Union of Great Britain is fighting the Red Flag in deadly earnest.
“A feature of the campaign in London is a series of drawing room meetings, at which well known politicians are delivering lectures on Socialism. An important one will be held on May 6th at 7, Eaton Square, S.W., when Lucy, Countess of Egmont, will be ‘at home.’ The chairman on this occasion will be Sir Gilbert Parker, M.P.” (author of that soul-stirring tragedy, “The Seats of the Mighty”). “Other drawing room meetings which are being arranged are those of
Lord Aldenham May 5
Mrs. Hornby Lewis May 10
Mrs. Lucas May 25
Lady Joicy May 31
“The Countess of Desart and the Earl of Dunmore will speak at Lord Aldenham’s meeting.” The italics are ours.

So it seems that the Socialist movement is doomed. No more may we agitate in the baronial halls of the labourer ; no longer seduce an unsuspecting working class with our vile and immoral doctrines.

We may agitate at the street corners. We may still propagate “the end of all” in the bye-ways and the slums. The gin-shop and the Park are still open to us. But we are for ever barred from the drawing room and all such places where the working class do congregate.

The A.S.U. of G.B. have at a stroke stopped at its source our most lucrative stream of supply ; and now as a result of the strenuous campaign of the A.S. etc., in the drawing rooms of this “our” country, we are undone.

In this, possibly the last, issue of our Party Organ (excuse this moisture, Mr. Printer), we thank all those workers who are in the habit of attending the drawing-rooms of mi-lud Addlehead and mi-lady Lucy, for the support they have given us in the past, and, handing them over to the tender mercies of Sir Gilbert Parker, M.P., reluctantly bid them farewell.

But stay ! Here we have a report of one of those epoch-making meetings, and on perusal thereof it would seem that our worst fears were justified. True it does not report what the the speakers said (which, of course, matters little) but merely gives a list of the peers and pierrettes who attended, and then goes on :

“The guests assembled in the drawing-room to listen to speeches on ‘Socialism’ ; Ellen, Lady Desart, Lord Dunmore and Cptn. Parsons being the speakers. Lady Aldenharn . . . wore mauve crepe and Lady Tweedale favoured shades of purple and a rose coloured hat with a panache of amethyst feathers. Lady Winifred Renshaw had on a grey tailor-made dress with a blue plume in her hat, and Lady Strathmore was in grey, with chinchilla furs.”

How withstand such warfare ? What chance have cordaroy and fustian joined in mortal combat with “chinchilla” and amethyst “panache” ? The legendary dragon himself were fore-defeated against a St. George in such armour ; and so, after many councils and much hard thinking, we conclude that discretion were the better part of valour, and that mi-Lady Twaddle and appendages may best be left to the tender mercies of the “Express” office boy.

T.

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