Imperialism!
When a certain Imperialist was dead, his friends, who had forgotten all about him when he was starving, thought his great love of the Empire should be fittingly memorialised, so they clubbed together to raise upon his grave a chaste headstone, upon which was inscribed the following beautiful legend:—
JOHN SMITH,
who worked hard and died poor, supported
Through all the trials and vicissitudes of life by
THE REFLECTION
that HE WAS THE PROUD INHERITOR
of a share
IN THE GLORIOUS EMPIRE UPON WHICH THE SUN NEVER SETS.
At his death he was placed in this grave,
and his share of THE GLORIOUS EMPIRE
was reverently shovelled in on top of him,
so that he
came by his own in
THE END.
—Stockton Bulletin