chelmsford

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Viewing 13 posts - 181 through 193 (of 193 total)
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  • in reply to: Labour Promise to abolish House Of Frauds #236640
    chelmsford
    Participant

    Of the two, the House of Lords is the more truly democratic chamber. MP’s are smarter, more ambitious and gifted with a greater degree of low-cunning than the average man-in-the-street. Now hereditary peers, selected as they are by mere accident of birth, will be far more representative of the general population in that they will include a few clever-dicks but a far larger number of blithering idiots.

    in reply to: Mao’s China? Ask a leper. #236553
    chelmsford
    Participant

    Mao ordered all the able-bodied men, women and children to go out and clap their hands to frighten the sparrows (who had been denounced as capitalist-roaders). His idea was that the birds would all die of exhaustion as they fluttered in terror from clapping Chinaman to clapping Chinaman. This shows Mao as being stupid as well as cruel. How could he be sure the birds would die of exhaustion before their tormentors? He would have looked a prize chump if he had been left with a billion dead Chinamen and some tired, resentful sparrows to rule over.
    On the other hand, to his credit, Mao did allow working people to smoke wherever they liked, even in the most trying circumstances, such as when, for one reason or another, they found themselves up before the firing squad.

    in reply to: Cost of living crisis #236072
    chelmsford
    Participant

    The aptly named Bankman-Fried will be having a difficult Christmas this year. Ho- Ho-Ho.

    in reply to: Russian Tensions #235957
    chelmsford
    Participant

    Emotionally I am still in the early sixties. No apologies for that.
    Mention has been made of conservative (‘right-wing’) commentators. Reading an old Daily Telegraph (yes – the other day) I came upon this in Auberon Waugh’s Way of the World Column:

    Our greatest test will come with the Russo-Ukrainian war, which I have been predicting ever since the break-up of the Soviet Union.

    Dated 9 February 1994. Can anyone come up with an earlier prediction.If you can’t it doesn’t really matter.

    in reply to: Brazil’s Election #235752
    chelmsford
    Participant

    The Boosh-wah political scene gets curiouser and curiouser. The Ukraine’s head honcho is a comedian and now the Brazilian electorate opt for an ageing North Caledonian warbler, who was a one-hit wonder with ‘Shout’.
    She has probably got some of the Luvvers in her cabinet.

    in reply to: Critisticuffs on Inflation #235636
    chelmsford
    Participant

    If you want to be a vanguard better join Securicor.

    in reply to: Critisticuffs on Inflation #235408
    chelmsford
    Participant

    The average height of Party members in five foot eight. Nothing small about that.

    in reply to: Cost of living crisis #235188
    chelmsford
    Participant

    My old dad would blow his heating allowance in pole-dancing clubs. He’d rather give his cut of surplus-value to hard-up east european women than utility shareholders.
    Died of bronchopneumonia though…
    Wonder if Lizzie45 knows the reformist rallying song, Talking Heads ‘Road to Nowhere’.

    in reply to: Cost of living crisis #235034
    chelmsford
    Participant

    I had a pleasant surprise on Tuesday. Postie dropped my quarterly electricity bill through the letter-box (as postmen do).I was expecting to experience some kind of unrequested bowel-movement, but there was nothing to pay. If fact the account is in credit. Just goes to show you should never believe anything you read in the newspapers, see on the telly or hear on the radio.

    in reply to: The Passing Show: the Death of a Clown #234942
    chelmsford
    Participant

    If poor old Enoch were alive today he would be turning in his grave.

    in reply to: Cost of living crisis #234882
    chelmsford
    Participant

    Dinner today will be newspaper stew followed by a plate of cold frugals. For afters we will be asked to imagine rice pudding. When I ask for more the beadle will give me a damn good thrashing and put me up for sale.
    If you can believe there is starvation in this country you can believe anything.

    in reply to: The Passing Show: the Death of a Clown #234881
    chelmsford
    Participant

    This will be the fourteenth prime minister I will have served under – and I’ve been poor under everyone of ’em.

    in reply to: Cost of living crisis #234769
    chelmsford
    Participant

    Went down the Blue Ram last night and you couldn’t get near the bar for pensioners. They were all on shorts. The Tories aren’t as daft as they pretend. Keep the ancientry sweet and you will be re-elected. A pensioner would sell her soul for a bag of werther’s originals.

Viewing 13 posts - 181 through 193 (of 193 total)